Monday, November 30, 2015

How to Catch a Runaway Cow

The drive home is never dull and today was no exception.  We learned how to catch a runaway cow - Nigerien style and of course, this being knowledge that you might soon have need of, I am here to fill you in on the process.

Supplies needed:
  • runaway cow
  • four able bodied and fast men
  • two motorcycles
  • two ropes

Step 1:  Get your cow good and angry so that he runs like a crazed maniac, slobbering and sending women and children scampering out of harm's way.

Step 2:  Two men on foot should begin the chase with ropes in hand.  As you get close to the cow, you may either throw your rope with a pre-tied loop around his horns or at his feet with the intention of snagging him.  Don't expect to be successful right away.  In fact, this will probably make your cow more determined to escape.  Move on to step three.

Step 3:  You will need to two friends on motorcycles to zoom up.  Hop on the back as fast as you can and make sure your rope is with you.  Follow your runaway cow onto the main street because of course, everyone - even cows know that you can go faster on the open road!

Step 4:  Have your friends drop you off ahead of the mad cow so that you can lay in wait.

Step 5:  If at first you don't succeed, try, try again....and don't worry this is Niamey, nobody but the crazy North Americans following you will think twice about all this going down in front of their eyes.
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